A worthy adversary

San Cristobal was full of hippies. There were
way-back hippies growing gray, spreading out under their caftans, and
straining the buttons on their embroidered work shirts. There were
new-hatched neohippies fumbling with the icons of the Sixties
wondering whether the peace symbol is supposed to be used mainly as a
nose stud or also as a pierced eyebrow ornament. And there were
smelly European backpacker hippies, age indeterminate, telling the
locals, "Ich bin ein Vegan."
--P.J. O'Rourke

There was a young rascal named James,
Who liked to play terrible games,
He lit up the front
Of his Grandmother's cunt
And laughed as she pissed through the flames!

I once worked as a contractor in another state, and another
girl on the team, also a contractor from quite a distance
away, was constantly ratting out other members of the team
to the boss, and was snippy and always overreacted to any
kind of language or inference to any sort of sexual topic.
She was constantly offended at our frequent joke-telling.
One Friday she was going to drive home - several states
away - for the weekend. Before she left, I stuck a bumper
sticker on the roof of her car (she was short so couldn't see it
up there) and the sticker said "I LIKE TO ---- TRUCKERS.
HONK IF YOU WANT ME TO PULL OVER" (the blank wasn't
blank on the sticker). I can only guess what kind of a ride
home she had. If she ever even GOT there....


Sent by Jennifer

Rabbit's Ph.D. Thesis:

A Parable for Graduate Students



Scene: It's a fine sunny day in the forest, and a rabbit is sitting outside
his burrow, tippy-tapping on his typewriter.

Along comes a fox, out for a walk.

Fox: "What are you working on?"

Rabbit: "My thesis."

Fox: "Hmmm. What's it about?"

Rabbit: "Oh, I'm writing about how rabbits eat foxes."
(incredulous pause)

Fox: "That's ridiculous! Any fool knows that rabbits don't eat foxes."

Rabbit: "Sure they do, and I can prove it. Come with me."

They both disappear into the rabbit's burrow. After a few minutes, the
rabbit returns, alone, to his typewriter and resumes typing.

Soon, a wolf comes along and stops to watch the hardworking rabbit.

Wolf: "What's that you're writing?"

Rabbit: "I'm doing a thesis on how rabbits eat wolves."
(loud guffaws)

Wolf: "You don't expect to get such rubbish published, do you?"

Rabbit: "No problem. Do you want to see why?"

The rabbit and the wolf go into the burrow, and again the rabbit
returns by himself, after a few minutes, and goes back to typing.

Scene: Inside the rabbit's burrow. In one corner, there is a pile of fox
bones. In another corner, a pile of wolf bones. On the other side of the
room, a huge lion is belching and picking his teeth.

(The End)

Moral:
It doesn't matter what you choose for a thesis subject.
It doesn't matter what you use for data.
What does matter is who you have for a thesis advisor.

It has come to my attention that CNN, the Communist News Network, has issued a copyright infringement claim against the Founding Bloggers, who posted a video of Susan Roesgen badgering and arguing with Chicago Tax Tea Party Protesters. Jim Treacher brought it to my attention.

[object Removed]

The first part, you will recognize. The second part, you may not. You see Roesgen arguing with a woman that is confronting her for not interviewing the regular people attending the rally. Roesgen responds with bewilderment that attendees are not protesting Obama, or even the Democrats, but Republicans as well.

Now, beyond that, this has really touched a nerve, because I am against copyright. Period. I don’t see copyright as a valid law. Back in the days of printing presses, you had to own a medallion that indicated that you were approved by the Crown to own a printing press. This way, they could keep an eye on those who were allowed to own the means of distribution of information, and prevent the mass creation of subversive materials.

Copyright was invented as a limitation on free speech. Today, we see an example of CNN using copyright for what? To limit free speech. Copyright is wrong. Plain and simple. I find the idea of “Intellectual Property” to be complete and utter bullshit. What is the premise of “Intellectual Property?” It’s that someone owns, not a physical item, not a physical plot of land, not a physical structure, but that they OWN an idea. How the fuck can you own an idea?

You can own a means of production of an idea. You can own a physical replicant of certain ideas, like books and dvds. You can own a means of distribution of an idea. But you cannot own the idea itself. But that is why copyright exists. It exists to say that MY means of production is the only legitimate one. MY means of distribution is the only legitimate one. MY physical replica is the only legitimate one?

Why?

You may have bought into arguments that the producer of that “Intellectual Property” needs to earn a living, and that by “Stealing” their work, you are taking their income. Bullshit. Business is more than just products. It’s also marketing and distribution.

In order to have a successful and thriving business, you need to be good at all of these parts. You can make the best product in the world, but if no one knows about it, you will fail. You can make crap, with no real world value to anyone, but if it is marketed right, you get elected to public office. Isn’t that right, President Obama?

Another form of “Intellectual Property” is patents. Patents allegedly protect someone who invents something from having their idea “stolen” from someone else. What patents really do is stifle technological growth. They were an okay idea when we wanted to inspire people to take up and develop technology, and wanted to offer an incentive. We are now to a place where technology is no longer being advanced by patents, but is being hindered instead.

Imagine if the producers of technology were able to look at the designs of competing firms and say, “I know how to make that better.” Instead, we demand that they come up with their designs in spite of their competition. In fact, they better not come up with anything even close, because that is how patents work. Even if you were to accidentally create something similar to someone else, too bad. They’re “protected” from your design improvement. We demand that every technology company reinvent the wheel with each advancement, rather than competing in the marketplace.

Who does intellectual property really protect? They protect the big, slow, backward, stupid, failed corporations that are too big, slow, backward, and stupid to compete in the marketplace. You know these businesses. They are the very same ones on the receiving end of the extortion payment that was being protested in Chicago. The very same bailout recipients that our Socialist government rewarded for their failure. They are protected by our Powermad politicians, using their laws, designed to control people, to reward the failure of businesses at our expense.

Then, when the wonder of the Internet allows the actual FREE and unfettered distribution of information, out comes this unjust law. Cease and desist! You’re embarrassing us, and this simply won’t do. To the degree that CNN’s footage has been used, It has already been aired!

They already used it. They already got paid by advertisers who had spots during that segment. They have lost nothing, except the control of the audience.

And that is the real issue here. It’s control. If you control the distribution of information, you control the audience of that information. If you can keep them ignorant of subversive ideas, they may not think them on their own. Alternately, they may not realize how many others are thinking those things. They may not know how many are there with them. These things are dangerous to those who rule by fear. Those who rule by fear tend to do so because they rule IN fear. In fear of losing their grip on power. So they want to control who has access to what.

This site does not seek to limit it’s distribution. That is why we operate under a license that allows you to modify, adapt, or build upon, for commercial or non-commercial use. All we ask for in return is attribution. That is why we allow you to subscribe to email updates, or your RSS aggregator, and give you the FULL feed. It’s more important to be distributed than to control the means of distribution. You don’t even need to visit the site. You can get your email update, and be done without missing a thing.

Someone who really understands the Internet would understand that traffic is actually a cost. If you’re not seeing that, it’s because you are not getting as much traffic as you are paying to allow for. Get a little more, and you will see that web traffic costs money. If you understand marketing, you know that it is good to be a ubiquitous brand. Demanding people visit the actual site is bad on both counts.

What is the most sold book ever? It’s the Bible. Who holds the copyright to it? No one. It is more important to distribute the ideas inside than it is to make a profit from it. Yet, every publisher is able to make a killing selling it. You can get it for free on the internet. Yet people continue to pay to own a copy, and it continues to be a best seller. No one is sitting there thinking, “Wait, what’s this book you’re talking about?” Everyone knows about it, because it’s not “protected” by a copyright, and publishers compete in the marketplace for sales.

About one third of visitors to this site use the Firefox web browser. Most of the rest use Internet Explorer, and the majority of them use it because it’s just there, on their computer when they buy it. They don’t think to change it, or don’t meet a convincing enough argument to change it. Maybe they are even afraid of their computer to such a degree that they fear changing their browser. But the point isn’t why people won’t use Firefox. It’s why do a full ONE THIRD of the market share use it?

Those one third will tell you it’s better. One feature they will point to is all the customizations that are available. The reason there is such a high availability of features is that Firefox is Open Source. This means anyone can make any copy or any improvement at any time for any reason. They just need to attribute the source code.

This should challenge you to ask a few questions, such as, how is Firefox even a business model if they don’t “protect” their “intellectual property?” Why aren’t there two gazillion thriving knockoffs? There may be two gazillion knockoffs, but they are not thriving. Why? Because they know how to compete on the finished product, it’s marketing, and it’s distribution. So far, they have won. In fact, they are so competitive, they have stolen one third of Microsoft’s market share. That’s one third of the market share of the biggest software company in the world. Could they have done this if they were “protecting” their “intellectual property?” I doubt it.

Firefox is winning because they have competed in the marketplace, and have done so successfully. Yet we don’t ask everyone to do this. We exempt some. More often than not, those we exempt are the big, slow, backward, stupid, failed corporations. Like CNN.

What do you think?

Also on this topic: CNN Using BS Copyright Argument to Bump Video

***
Wina a copy of Glenn Beck’s Unelectable DVD. Go to the contest entry page. Enter the password “winner” follow the remaining instructions.

A series of unrelated crap:

1. I took a picture of this semi with my phone while I was driving because I’m totally safe like that.

And then I was all “when did jam get flammable?”  Because honestly, there are some things that you shouldn’t have to worry about spontaneously combusting and one of those is jam.  The other is babies but apparently they’re bursting into flames all the time too because why else do all of their pajamas scream ”FLAME RETARDANT” on them.  That’s why you aren’t allowed to put blankets on them at night.  Blankets are like baby kindling.  I always hold babies at an arms length just in case they suddenly catch fire.  Also because I’m not good with children.

2.  Victor had to do a redesign on my blog because it kept breaking and now it feels very Swedish and reminds me of tundra.  I wanted it to be all ninja-like and remind me of Garanimals.  Victor was all “What the fuck are you talking about?  What’s a Garanimal?” and I’m all “You know.  They were like mix and match clothes for rich kids.”  And then I started talking about how if Garanimals was still in business and I was in their marketing department I’d totally use that Nine Inch Nails song that’s all “I Wanna Fuck You Like an Animal” and change it to “I Wanna Wear You Like Garanimals” because people would sing it all the time and then Victor was all “What is wrong with you?” and I’m like “That’s probably why they went out of business” and Victor was all “Yeah, that’s why they went out of business” but then I looked them up and turns out they’re still in business and I think I just confused them with the ShirtTales.  In other words, I’m not sure if I like my blog redesign.

3.  A new Ask the Bloggess advice column is up.  How to shave male junk, cat umbilical cords, dead Mayans, blah, blah, blah.

4.  I wanna wear you like Garanaimals.  Seriously, I can’t stop singing it.

Onion Radio News - with Doyle Redland

My daughter Marina worked in my law office while she attended graduate school. One morning a call came in for her. I said she wasn't in yet and offered to take a message. The caller said she'd phone back later.

At 11:00 a.m., the caller tried again, and I reported that Marina had gone to lunch.

The last call came in at 3:30 p.m. "I'm sorry," I said, "she's left for the day. May I take a message?"

"Yes," the caller replied. "How can I get a job with you?"

Received from Thomas Ellsworth.

Last week I did an interview with a site called Living Waters. A guy named Hank asked some great questions and we talked for about 20 minutes or so. Here’s how the interview concluded at the end of the podcast:

Hank:
"Best wishes on your site and your new book coming out and side hugs to you buddy."

Me:
“Well thanks, I really appreciate it Hank and thank for you keeping me on your radar. I
look forward to hearing how horrible I sound on a recorded device. The two thoughts I have are 'wow, I sound horrible and what a cocky jerk. So here’s hoping only number one comes through. Here’s hoping.”

Hank:
(Host laughs)
“Well, we’ll see what the comments come in like.”

Me:
“Well I know mine’s going to be like, ‘What a cocky jerk.’ So let me go ahead and get that out of the way.”

Here's the link to the podcast which starts at about the 5:30 mark.

writes our anonymous submitter: “unable to visit my mother last year for mother’s day, my partner and i sent her a box of chocolate truffles and an antique brooch. this is her ‘thank you’ note (which is really more like a ‘fuck you’ note).”

the final “fuck you,” of course, is the nearly indecipherable handwriting. here’s the transcription:

Looked forward to seeing you on Mother’s day. In Lieu of such optimism I enjoyed the truffles as fattening as they are + the pin is very attractive. Thanks. Love, Mom

related: i can has guilt trip?

extra credit: have you entered the PAN mother’s day giveaway?

Awesome. 
Awesome? 
Awesome!
Come to daddy.
Du-de. 
Epic fail. 
Fail.
Failski.
For reals? 
In that case, you're not going to like this, but...
Is that, like, your final answer? 
Let me Google that for you.
Needs more cowbell.
Not your night? Not your night!
Now you tell me.
That'll do it. 
That looks like fun.
That's so money.
That's so Raven.
That's so wack.
Uh...what?
Yeah.
Yeah?
Yeah!
Yeah, awesome.
Yeah, awesome?
Yeah, awesome!
Yeah, come to daddy.
Yeah, du-de.
Yeah, epic fail.
Yeah, fail.
Yeah, failski.
Yeah, for reals?
Yeah, in that case, you're not going to like this, but...
Yeah, is that, like, your final answer?
Yeah, let me Google that for you.
Yeah, needs more cowbell.
Yeah, not your night? Not your night! Yeah, now you tell me.
Yeah, right.
Yeah, right! 
Yeah, that'll do it.
Yeah, that looks like fun.
Yeah, that's so money.
Yeah, that's so Raven.
Yeah, that's so wack.
Yeah, uh...what?
Yeah, whee, we're all gonna die!
Yeah, whoo hoo!
Yeah, whuh-whoh.
Whee, we're all gonna die! Whoo hoo!
Whuh-whoh.
Yo, are you writing down everything I say? 
Yo, do you take me as a shallow, alienated clown with no real sense of irony other than saying 'Zoinks, Scooby?'
Zoinks, Scooby!
Zzzz...wha?
0 to 60, baby.

Slideshow

Every time I move my files from one computer to another, I ask Jon to transfer everything, and then I reload my files into iTunes manually. As a result, my current computer has about 30 GB of duplicate mp3 files.

Recently, I’ve been working with larger image files, which has made me aware of how much space I have left on my MacBook Pro. Understandably, I’d rather not have 30 GB of duplicate files.

Download Here

I started weeding through these manually, and then realized there’s a script for everything and I was wasting hours of my life. After a quick Google search, I found Doug’s AppleScripts for iTunes.

I checked with Jon to make sure I wasn’t going to fry my computer with this download (always a good step in your download process) and downloaded the file. There are directions on the site re: the correct way to download & open the file, just in case you do not also have an IT guy held hostage by marriage.

Getting All Your Mp3 Files Into Your iTunes Library

You can skip this section if you don’t have mp3 files outside of your iTunes Library.

If you have mp3 files outside of the iTunes Library (Music > iTunes > iTunes Music), you may want to move all the mp3s on your computer to iTunes first. To do this, open iTunes, go to File > Add to Library and select your main home folder, or whichever folder where you store your non-iTunes mp3s.

Read this whole paragraph before taking any action: After copying these files, you can delete all mp3 files outside of your iTunes Library. When I did this, I searched for “mp3″ and deleted any folder outside of the Library. Before you do this, you may want to back up your files first. (I used Time Machine.) You may also want to check a few files manually to make sure they are still working before you click Empty Trash.

Organizing Your Files

For organizational purposes, you may want to run File > Library > Consolidate Library. This will organize all your iTunes within your Library.

Using Dupin to Remove Your Duplicate Mp3 Files

Criteria

Now that you’re all organized, open Dupin, select your Criteria on the sidebar on the left and click Get Dupes on the top left. This will give you a list of 40 files, or 20 Dupe Groups. Initially, all of the files will be checked, meaning that Dupin will save these files. The criteria I use is: Name, Artist, Album, Time, Size and Track Number, but you may need to adjust it depending on your files.

Filter

Filter your playlist using the Filter Controls. I recommend Single Arbitrary, but just think about what makes the most sense for you. For example, since I had a lot of copied files, most of my file names looked like this: “Float On.mp3″ and “Float On 1.mp3″ so I filtered by Shorter Filename and removed all the files with the “1.mp3″ added on.

Check Your Work

Once half your files are checked and half are unchecked, take a quick look at the files to make sure the unchecked ones are the ones you want to delete. After a couple runs, you’ll be confident in your Criteria and Filter method, and will be able to skip this step.

Purge

When you’re ready to delete the duplicates, go to Tools > Purge. Click Remove when prompted. You will be asked if you want to keep the files or move them to trash. Since I wanted more space, I selected Move to Trash. If space isn’t an issue for you, you might choose to keep the files.

Paranoia Test

And you’re done! If you’re paranoid like me, you’ll test files periodically to make sure that they’re still working correctly in iTunes.

Warning

If you have files that vary widely in terms of quality, you may need to be more stringent with your Criteria and Filter methods. You may even want to go through these files manually, to avoid deleting the better quality files.

Dupin Review

This is a good application. It works exactly as advertised, is pretty simple to use, and it’s free (the demo version). This is a feature Apple might want to consider incorporating in iTunes to make it available to more users.

Here are more pictures from the Manchester New Hampshire Tea Party but first a little something about the media coverage…

I loved how the media played dogpile on the rabbit when it came to the Tea Parties. And the liberals call themselves animal lovers?

Some seemed excited, even giddy to oblige of course.

The way he was panting and salivating, I wondered if Keith Olbermann hit his head on the bashing bandwagon ceiling on the way into the MSNBC studios Wednesday.

There is no truth to the rumor this caused another tingling in Chris Matthews’ leg however.

Can you blame the reporters of CNN though?

They had to take time out of their busy schedule writing up exposes of Obama’s new dog (no not Olbermann) or noting Barack’s awesome talent for gift-giving to cover the rallies of the radicals.

CNN Reporter: “They call this a protest? They didn’t even have bottled mineral water. Wait until the boys at the yacht club hear about this travesty.”

Oh the humanity!

No wonder why they were so edgy covering the American extremists.

I just hope someone handed Susan Roesgen a Midol after her Tea Party interview. Lord knows she could have used one.

On with the pics…

You know someone was going there eventually with a Hitler/Obama comparison. Then again, organizing a community to hate another group of people could technically be considered the job duties of a community organizer.

Oh geez I just went there too. Whoops.

How can you tell this is not a liberal rally? The United States flag of course.

To borrow a phrase from the liberal moonbats: “Yes we can!”

From within the eye of the tax revolt storm. And what’s up with the “glowing” church in the background?

Because Obama’s team cares about us. Really they do. Just ask them.

The best sign contest at the end of the Tea Party. In the foreground are some of the Drunken Sailors.

Too late. Our tax dollars are already hard at work helping ACORN, the liberal organization with the acronym for a type of nut recruit people for their evil bidding.

The sign on the left reminds me of a great quote from talk show host Jerry Doyle:

“The opposite of pro is con and the opposite of progress is Congress.”

No that shadow is not me. It is the shadow of Tax-You-To-Death lurking at our doorstep. It also might have been the guy next to me taking a picture though. Not sure 100%.

It means something but I still don’t get the blanket part. Wish I had thought to ask her about it then.

On a side note is that a 1984 sign in the background? If not it is 1994 which should send chills down Democrats’ spines. 2010 is not far away…

Not to worry, it still exists. We are personally responsible for giving our tax dollars to the government to squander.

This was the Coalition of New Hampshire Taxpayers‘ booth, one of the many political groups in attendance.

Wait, you mean Tim Geithner printing money in the middle of the night in the Treasury’s basement is counterfeiting? Obama said it was legal.

This was one of a rotating set of signs on a billboard on a pickup truck parked alongside the Tea Party. Nice of Nancy to feel something for NH being that she can’t feel her own face but I concur with the sentiment of course.

And finally one of my favorite pictures from the Tea Party…

_________________________________________________________

Chris Cameron is a writer for Radioactive Liberty. You can read his Quick Hits political humor column every Tuesday and his other weekly column every Wednesday here at RL. He also writes insane and judgemental funny stuff at his own humor blog Angry Seafood.

***
Wina a copy of Glenn Beck’s Unelectable DVD. Go to the contest entry page. Enter the password “winner” follow the remaining instructions.

Although the first vehicle to move under its own power (for which there is documentation) was built by M. Brezin in 1769, it really wasn't until the end of the 19th century that a flurry of automobile-building activity took off.

"Can we get a panic room that's also a gun?"

Gypsy boy in bear costume

Reality is only just a word.

- Harry Chapin

There was a young girl named Anheuser Who said that no man could surprise her. But Pabst took a chance, Found Schlitz in her pants, And now she is sadder Budweiser.

An airline pilot wrote that on this particular flight he had hammered
his ship into the runway really hard. The airline had a policy which
required the first officer to stand at the door while the passengers
exited, give a smile, and a "Thanks for flying XYZ airline." He said
that in light of his bad landing, he had a hard time looking the
passengers in the eye, thinking that someone would have a smart
comment.
Finally everyone had gotten off except for this little old lady walking
with a cane. She said, "Sonny, mind if I ask you a question?" "Why no
Ma'am," said the pilot, "What is it?" The little old lady said, "Did we
land or were we shot down?"

How do you know a blond has been using your computer?

When the joy stick is wet!


Sent by Richard